lonely lonely birthday

My birthday is coming soon but i just don feel any happy or exciting feeling... maybe i have

been study in melbourne for 3 years and the past 3 years birthday i also celebrate there...

Actually each year i will celebrate my birthday in melburne..the reason i do so maybe i just don

wanna be lonely and i really scare of any surprice...not that i don want surprice just that i really

scare no one remember my birthday... since i worry of friends forgot of my birthday so i decide

to celebrate my birthday each year and ask friends come along..

This year, i didn organise any party for myself or anything...maybe i just don know who to tell

and who will be free to come for my birthday.. i really don feel like telling anyone my birthday is

coming soon but i just really scare no one will remember it...

Maybe most of my friends will say my bf will celebrate for me..and yes i know my bf do and

really care of my birthday. But i guess i am a bit too greedy i want my friend, family and bf care

of it..haha

I guess i really too scare of lonely and really need lots of friends to pamper me...haha maybe i

am just like a baby need friends and everyone surrounding me to pamper me... i know this is not

possible and sometimes i just too protective too..sometimes when someone really care of me i

will just too scare and worry... i will rather run away from that person...i also don know why...

Anyway... i will wish myself happy birthday... hope that i will have a happy birthday and

memorable night..